TiSB #134: The Grand Finale
Well, it’s been a long road, but all good things… Here it is, our last episode of This is Serious Business.
This episode contains audio excepts from The Price is Right, We Don’t Need Another Hero by Tina Turner, The Final Countdown by Europe, and Independence Day (FOX).
Rob went on to invent a new form of videography called a “Bounce Shot.” It involves a seamless cut at the base of a trampoline bounce, typically switching in a cute creature to make it look like you were bouncing with a bunch of happy animal friends. He used this technique to create the largest YouTube empire in history, and it was subsequently featured in the summer hit, Furious 17: Even Fasterer. Despite his success, he never managed to win another fantasy summer box office.
Christin went on to elaborately frame Gisele Bundchen in a cunning casino heist. She then used her newfound wealth to bring back Hannibal for another season, adding herself as a mysterious new character. Her scheme was complete when she had Tom Brady guest star and really hit it off with him.
Jon managed to create the largest Batman themed mural in the history of the world, spanning the entire western face of the Burj Khalifa in Dubai. For this, he won serious art cred. Unfortunately, DC Comics sued him, but he was immediately hired by Marvel for triple his settlement costs.
Michelle produced the first actual, working TARDIS, and is largely responsible for allowing Jon to complete his project via the use of time travel. She then spent decades pondering the nature of existence in a universe that could be influenced by time travel, but ultimately chalked it up to wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff while enjoying a nice trip with her family to Ancient Egypt.
Marcus won the MTG pro tour and lived in effing Hawaii. His only regret… was that he had… boneitus…
Steve became a world champion wakeboarder, thrusting the sport into the forefront of public attention with his never ending charisma and charm. He also played Cloud in the Hollywood adaptation of Final Fantasy VII, but had trouble getting over his creative differences with director Lars von Trier.
Ben became the savior of humanity, as was fortold.
Jeff, well, that’s another story altogether…